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Reed Mindset

In our dress rehearsal Saturday morning I became aware of just how GREAT my reed was. It felt so EASY to play the oboe.I could come in perfectly softly, with or without a strong attack.I could enter loudly and in tune, with or without accent.My pitch was centered, my tone was attractive.I could taper right off the ends of notes EXACTLY as I needed to.And all of these things just felt RIGHT.It’s so unusual to have a reed that I didn’t have to MANAGE, that I didn’t have to keep an awareness of in the back of my head, that I didn’t have to massage in certain registers or dynamics.I could just THINK a musical gesture and then DO it, without compromise.It was a fantastic feeling.
RIGHT IMMEDIATELY behind that awareness of my great reed came anxiety.How terrible would it feel when I inevitably had to return to a lesser reed?When this one died?How could I ever make something THIS GOOD again?WHAT IF my concert reed tonight was LESS GOOD, could I perform as well as I was doing right now? Shou…
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Open Arms

In rehearsal last night, the concertmaster suggested to the strings that they play with a more open bow arm. I don’t know precisely what that phrase means to a string player - if it’s a technical term or more of a kinetic metaphor - but it immediately set my mind spinning.
When I am playing my best, I do feel open. I feel that there’s a lovely big halo of air around me, like the space surrounding me is part of the physical act. I feel spaciousness in my chest and softness in my elbows and I’m grounded through my chair or my feet but everything else is lifted and filled with air and space and ROOM. I have open arms.
This sensation - or the lack of it - stood out to me in my first Dreams and Visions performance last week. I have since listened back to the recording, and honestly things didn’t go all that badly - but I FELT bad in the moment. I started getting a lot of water in the instrument, I got flustered, and I got into my own head about it - and my usual expansive body awarene…

Shaq and the Oboe

Here’s my FAVORITE thing about that Shaquille O'Neal video everyone's sharing this week - it’s how HAPPY he is playing this silly game and how little he CARES what the oboe actually SOUNDS LIKE or how to play it. 
Almost as if the oboe is not a giant obstacle to overcome.

Instead of focusing on the CRAFT of the instrument, the precise fingerings, the quality of the sound, the finesse of the vibrato - his focus is on DELIVERING the SONG.   It’s on COMMUNICATION, not perfection.


What a LIBERATING concept!


When I am playing my best, I find that I can surpass the STRUGGLE and come to a place where my focus is on communication.   I can sing through the instrument, and I can use that voice to reach out and find someone else.  This is really what being In the Zone means for me - it's when I don’t have to engage with the OBOE and instead can be generous with my VOICE for the audience.


I seek and strive for this Zone all the time - it’s the whole point of practicing! I practice long…

Tall Poppy Syndrome

I’ve been reading about Tall Poppy Syndrome, since hearing SOMEONE mention it in a podcast interview.I’m embarrassed that I can’t source that podcast - too much travel recently, too many amazing podcast interviews.I have no idea who drew it to my attention.
Basically, though, it’s the concept that anyone who seems to be getting above their station needs to be cut back down.Someone who presents as better than other people should be brought down to size, because everyone ought to be equal. Don’t be sticking your neck out, don’t draw attention to yourself.
This shows up in orchestras a lot. An orchestra is rigidly hierarchical, and there’s only one principal flute, only one concertmaster.No one is surprised that a concertmaster gets to play a solo.But when a section player stands out in any way - starts a chamber music series, gives a recital, speaks at an event - that person begins to get the side-eye.Who does she think she is, right?
I don’t buy it.
It advances everyone if a member of the…

Discouraging Words

I can remember at least two old cranky violinists coming to talk to young me about NOT going into music.  There was a session, for example, during a Rochester Philharmonic Youth Orchestra retreat in which a real RPO professional (who was probably 47 but whom I remember as ancient) told us that, statistically, no one who graduates from music school wins auditions for jobs because there are only like 4 jobs out there in the world and 7000 hotshots coming into the job market every week. 

Quit NOW. 

I may have misremembered the details of this speech, but I remember the emotional jolt.  It was designed to discourage.

Last weekend I was presenting at a Double Reed Festival, and heard some oboists grumbling about another presenter who had evidently given something of the same talk to a roomful of masterclass attendees and participants.  High school students and cheerful adult amateurs.

And look, there's an element of truth to this.  Classical music is not a growing field, and it is leg…

My Favorite Things: Printer Edition

Art lives from constraints and dies from freedom -Leonardo da Vinci
The more constraints one imposes, the more one frees one’s self. And the arbitrariness of the constraint serves only to obtain precision of execution - Igor Stravinsky
Sometimes constraints actually create success. Not being able to swim made me run.And running taught me the discipline I needed as a writer - Malcolm Gladwell I bought a printer this summer.I bought it specifically to carry in the camper with us when we took our long national parks vacation.It was the smallest, lightest, simplest printer I could find that did what I needed - it printed in color or black and white on letter size paper, period.With it, I was able to run my reed business from the road, and it took up barely any space, and weighed almost nothing, and it was also white and cute. I loved it for the freedom it gave me - to mail reed shipments from anywhere - and for its adorable design factor.
I had a printer, of course, at home.My big busine…

I Love Auditions

I love auditions.No, I do, really.First of all, I like the game of it.Fifty people come to the hall, one leaves victorious.The drama is deeply fun.
I love playing auditions.Picture it - you get to walk out onto an unfamiliar but beautiful stage, the home stage of an orchestra better than yours. You have the entire space to yourself.Gazing up into the rows of darkened seats, you can take deep breaths and choose the perfect moment in which to break the silence.You can stand there for up to fifteen minutes, playing all of the BEST and most famous solos for your instrument, to an audience that is listening intently and wanting you to succeed.You can take these solos at the tempo you choose, in the style you like.No conductor is trying to alter your vision of the piece. It’s all for you.
I love sitting behind the screen, too.It’s fascinating to listen to other people audition, and to hear what their preparation has brought to the table.Humans are amazing, right? I love watching the Olympi…